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Sheeba Nearing Retirement

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Back when we were still naive enough to use AT&T Wireless for our cell phone service, I remember the connection problems getting so bad that for any call I initiated – whether personal or business – I got in the habit of quickly shooting a rapid-fire summary of essential facts as soon as I started the call, since I had every reason to believe that I might not make it so much as five minutes on a typical call without getting cut off. An AT&T executive laughed it off, pointing out that with AT&T, “You don’t pay for good service,” then saying I was free to quote him. Yeah, right, but start forcing me to act unnatural on my calls, and you’re just begging me to go with a cell phone service that respects its customers and knows what good service means to us both.

Whatever. Thing is, I’m now getting the creeps that maybe AT&T has crept in and taken control of Sheeba, my personal laptop computer. Old as Sheeba is, she really does need to consider retirement, perhaps become just an unplugged toy for toddlers the way Susan‘s IBM rock of a lemon quickly did. But this past week has been getting downright intolerable: sometimes I barely get the damned machine turned back on from one crash before it decides to crash on me again. So like I had to do for AT&T Wireless’ shrugging off any attempt at providing reasonable service, with Sheeba I’m getting in the habit of preparing as much as possible off on other machines – including an even older Palm PDA!! – then rushing my personal tasks through as quickly as possible as soon as I turn Sheeba on, holding my breath at every keystroke expecting that next crash to come when I least need or want it to occur. And like with the AT&T Wireless phone calls, when I swear it got so bad that I was spending as much time re-dialing dropped calls as they gave me to actually spend talking, with Sheeba I’m starting to feel like I spend more time re-booting and getting back to where I was and what I was doing, versus the duration of the brief periods I get actually using the machine between crashes.

So, now I’m treating Sheeba to some patriotically correct waterboarding sessions to torture all useful information out of her, moving her photographs and other files off onto CDs and flash drives and Internet parking slots. Then she’ll get put out of her misery.

bumper sticker [] - golem

Written by macheide

9 November 2008 at 4:52 pm

Posted in golem


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