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Archive for April 21st, 2008

What’s On My Mind?

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If you could read the minds of one gender (think Mel Gibson in What Women Want): men (1) or women (2) ?


Response: 2 Because I prefer roller coasters over merry-go-rounds.

“Women are irrational, that’s all there is to that! Their heads are full of cotton, hay, and rags.” – Professor Henry Higgins, My Fair Lady

But then again . . .

“if my thought-dreams could be seen, they’d probably put my head in a guillotine.” – Bob, It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding)

//] - strawpoll

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 5:06 pm

Posted in strawpoll


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jello through a straw

Little Did You Know: I like to eat my jello with a straw.

bumper sticker [] - dossier

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 3:10 pm

Posted in dossier

TRAS Is a 4-Letter Word

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OK, so I’m uninformed enough to think that my attendance at the Enrolled Actuaries Meeting two weeks ago was for “training.” Uininformed that “training” is a TRAS accounting code reserved for specific internal government training courses with specific training class codes. I suppose there’s even a specific internal government training course that might have taught me that, if only I were courageous enough to take it (as in, the type of courage that leads men to jump off cliffs).

But TRAS – the recordkeeping system that I have to use for my governmental agency travel expenses – is apparently sufficiently informed about what “training” means, that when I get around to the second major procedure – filling out my expense vouchers – and finally make it to the very final step of that procedure – electronically signing my voucher – the system is smart enough to not let me do so because there ain’t no training class code for the EA Meeting.

So tell me, if the TRAS system designers were bright enough to program that into the voucher procedure, would it have been all that terribly difficult for them to shove a pop-up screen warning of that way way back as one of the very first steps of the first procedure, the expense authorization itself? Instead of making me and my manager unwind what already took me more than 3 hours to fill out, so I could redo everything as “general” instead of as “training”?

So together with the 5 hours spent with SATO, our government travel agency, over their blunder that wiped out my return flight, plus the time I spent in rescheduling a return on April 10th instead of my original flightplan for the 9th, together with all the usual travel arrangements, together with all this time of struggling through TRAS only to have to redo it from scratch because they can’t tell me I’ve did something wrong at the beginning until I’ve made it all the way to the end, not counting time my manager has spent on my forms for this trip, I figure I put in at least 12 hours just on the administrative hassles. For maybe 15 hours of actual hardcore actuarial time spent at the EA Meeting itself.

TRAS hates me. That’s OK, the feeling’s mutual. And very personal. I’ve been known to crash systems. Watch out, TRAS.

bumper sticker [] - formaphobe

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 1:59 pm

Posted in formaphobe

Fortune Zero

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The 2008 Fortune 1000 has finally been released. If I were grading their work for timeliness, I’d give them a flat zero. Five years ago when corporate annual statements were due March 31, Fortune actually released their list earlier in April than they’ve finally managed to drag their sorry butt through the door today, when they had a full extra month since this year’s Sarbanes-Oxley February 29 filing deadline.

I could have published this list myself as early as the Ides of March from spare-time hobby puttering done in connection with my interests in pension plans. If Fortune is as late next year, perhaps I will.

bumper sticker [] - vagblanc

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 6:27 am

Posted in vagblanc

Accidental Telecommuter

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accidental telecommuter

I had planned to commute into the office for work today. But upon reaching a major birthday, Susan decided to break one of the most basic rules of the Mom’s Union: for the first time in the decade I’ve known her, she’s confined to her bed sick. So I’ll do my work from the house today and pretend to be a nurse. (This from the same man who melted the steam cleaner yesterday. She’d better not ask me for any hot tea.)

bumper sticker [] - bedhead

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 6:04 am

Posted in bedhead

custom do

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i meet up with a woman who works only very early mornings designing hair for th day, as her clients wish, for a specific decision to be made, for a particular meeting that is planned, for a task that is scheduled. sometimes a specific need calls only for several strands of hair to be curled out to th side differently, other times th combination of expected events calls for a collective coordinated movement over th entire head. she is widely known to be th best at her craft, and she has many clients who trust her daily

i myself never need to voice my requests for th day. she feels inside where th hair needs to be, and she has never been wrong

Bumper Sticker [] - oneirra

Written by macheide

21 April 2008 at 4:04 am

Posted in oneirra